My how things have changed...

So...today is my birthday! I turned 34, and you know...I've realized just how much I've changed over the years.

I did absolutely nothing, short of going to church. I had plans of hanging out with the girl's doin our thing, but that got overshadowed by some unforseen circumstances with one of them.

But...even before I was aware of my girl's situation, I came home from church thinking..."man, I could really stand with not doing anything but chilling with some prailines n cream haagen daaz and calling it a day!"

After a power nap, me and the crew caught up and they tried to get me to come out. I suppose I was already somewhat agitated that I couldn't get in contact with the person who organized our soiree, so I decided against it. We're going to paint the town red tomorrow with some spa treatments and a girl's day out, so that should be cool!

It's funny, though. There was a time when I would've cried my eyes out because I wasn't with my friends and fam. from back home. But this time...I'm cool as a cucumber!

I'm almost scared that I've become so comfortable with being by myself. There was a time when I HAD to have a crowd of people around me. I could barely stand to be alone with my own thoughts. As soon as I walked in the house, the tv or stereo had to be on...or I had to be having a phone conversation. The only time I was really by myself was when I was sleeping.

Fast forward to today. I'm at home with a hot cup of tea and a book, and on my birthday nonetheless!! And...I'm ok with that.

I'm thankful that I've gotten to a place where I'm comfortable in my own company. That's pretty cool. But it's also scary. I hope I don't get so used to being alone that I put thing's in the universe that would inhibit me from attracting other's into my circle. Maybe that's another thing for me to work on...hmm, maybe I've inspired another blog already!

At any rate, I'm thankful for another year. A new path is ahead...it'll be interesting to see where this leads!

Stay tuned...there's certainly more to come.

Ciao....

PosB

A change gon' come

Wow...it's been a minute. Did ya miss me?? *wink*

Life has taken over and it's been difficult to find time to blog. But...I'm back on track and hopefully, you'll hear more from me!

The last 2 years have been interesting to say the least. It seems that just as I recovered from one crisis, another was looming. My patience, faith, and tenacity were all put to the test.

But now...I'm on the other side of the drama and as always, I'm looking back in retrospect trying to contemplate the lessons I was supposed to take away from all this. A couple things have become very apparent...

Firstly, we're all alot stronger than we think. There's nothing like a series of crises to put us to the test and reveal the survivor in us all.

Secondly, it's not just about surviving..it's about living. And living, is not just about the quest to acquire more material gain, the next big promotion, or the perfect man or woman. Living...truly living is about finding purpose in your existence and that purpose should include helping someone else recognize their full potential.

I'm realizing now, more than ever, that the reason we go through crisis is ultimately to help someone else. You can never really be of service to anyone if you haven't been where they are. Otherwise, you're just paying lip service and not really adding much value.

Struggle is never fun. It's not easy, and it hurts like hell. But in actuality, struggle is, in my opinion, growth pains for grown-ups. There's usually a lesson for you to learn that for whatever the reason, didn't become apparent the first 50 times so God, in his infinite wisdom, decided you were going to learn the lesson no matter what the cost.

When you're going through the struggle everything gets thrown off. Your thoughts are consumed with the struggle. Everything you do or say is in some way a by-product of whatever it is you're going through. Sleep is affected, your appetite, and sometimes...even your will to go on is shaken.

But if you can just hold on...change always comes. What seemed like something that was unbearable suddenly pales in comparison to the reality of what lies ahead.

I'm not saying it's easy cause God knows it aint. But if you can just hold on, even when there doesn't seem as though there's anything left to hold on to...you can reap in due season if you just don't faint.

See ya on the flipside!!

PosB